LIVING SINGLE IN NYC
by Liz Magee
|If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends… –credit|
Speaking on behalf of those of us so compelled to leave home and move to New York City that we actually did it, the friendships you make and maintain here are critical to your success and overall happiness. Without a solid network, the city can otherwise be a lonely, woeful place as depicted in many an Edward Hopper painting. My friends in NYC are family.
|A big city can be a sad, lonesome place. Edward Hopper gets it in “Summer Interior.” –credit|
This being the case, there is a bit more weight added to the situation of meeting the friends, because in many ways it’s like meeting the family. When your parents are many states away and you happen to be significant other-less, who’s your I.C.E (In case of emergency)? A roommate perhaps?
I honestly can’t think of a single, single gal who lives in NYC, in her mid-late twenties, and is completely roommate-less. In some situations, roommates are best friends from college or high school even. Or, perhaps they are perfect strangers you connected to via Craigslist that happened to meet all of the specifications/demands listed in your ad. Regardless of the origin, the roommate relationship is a critical one.
Like any relationship, all the standard elements are required to keep things running smoothly; communication, compromise, and courtesy. For single gals living in New York City with roommates, there is a certain protocol. One form of said protocol is the “courtesy text.” The heads-up that you should probably not make breakfast in only your panties tomorrow morning. The heads-up that if you hear a strange male voice at some point throughout the night, don’t worry; it’s not an intruder and we’re not being robbed. The courtesy text lets the roommates know that your gentleman caller of the time will be making an appearance at the apartment.
Whether it’s your roommates or your gal-pals from boroughs beyond, there comes a time when you need them to back you up on the drums and/or guitar for an emergency scream-out of Alanis Morissette’s “You Oughta Know” on your Rockband, because you finally found out why he hasn’t been responding to your texts. Again, like every relationship, it’s give and take. Your family of friends will be here for this and you will be there when they need the same.
|“You oughta know..”–credit|
It’s easy to get caught up in the pursuit for the ideal romantic relationship, but I feel that it is equally important to invest in a relationship with a friend. It’s all about the little things. Small gestures. Attention to detail. Dropping off a Pumpkin Spice Latte on that day at work she’s been dreading. Keeping her company when she has to make the trek to the post office in the Bronx to pickup that package she missed. Ask how her day was and really listen.
Too many times I’ve heard of people exiting long-term romantic relationships and then they’re faced with the harsh reality. “Wait, where’d all my friends go?” Keep your friends. Be good to your friends. Listen to your friends when they have their suspicions about the new guy you’ve been bringing around. (Trust me, I’ve recently learned that one the hard way.) Assure them that they’ve got a friend in you.
|You’ve got a friend in me! — image courtesy of Pixar|